No Gangsta Love
by kr3ativ23
Summary: Sequel to Miss Cate. what happened to Jay and Catherine after the birth of their children? Catherine and Jay broke up but is he doing any better? Full Summary inside. How do they act away from eachother and can they stay away from eachother. Post GD
1. Us Then

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch1: Us Then

* * *

It all started when I was called to a 419 in the projects right outside the strip, there had always been gangs in Vegas they just weren't popular. The gang was called the KOB*K boys which stood for Kill of be Killed, the 'boys' wore purple and black and were covered in tattoos.

The leader of their gang came, his name Jay Heldon. At the time he had kob*k written on his jaw line and a dark purple star on his neck and some more arm his arms with dark blonde hair with hints of black he was cute in a bad boy kind of was. He was big and strong his eyes were the lightest blue I had ever seen.

His younger brother, Tyler Heldon, was the suspect of a murder I was investigating; I remember Jay would call me on a daily basis with questions about the evidence and how it was tested. Never to insult me but he simply didn't understand what the words meant he just wanted to help his brother.

I left work early one day to get some grocery shopping done and I see Jay. He was and still is a nice guy just very misguided. He walks me to my car I was feeling the urge to kiss him… I remember that night I had just scolded him for calling me Miss Cate it was his little nickname for me.

A rival gang interrupted us and boy oh boy it sent forth a strange series of events. Jay and I were both attacked by these gang members and then dumped in the woods of Lake Tahoe.

I thought that Jay was going to have his way with me then kill me. But he never even tried anything even when I threw myself at him; he carried me for miles when I didn't feel like walking. By the time we were found he had grown on me oh and the police thought that he had kidnapped me but after that mess was taken care of we parted ways. He was going to get out of the gang, and go back to school he said he wanted to become a better person. When I was home I missed him terribly, thankfully he came over and we were together.

We secretly dated for a while and a invited him to the Annual Police Ball, Jay surprised me with showing me he got a tattoo or tattoos rather he had Miss on his left wrist and Cate on his other. It surprised me to say the least. I dropped Jay off a Gang relief reform shelter. It was suppose to help Jay adjust back into regular normal life. He was jumped outside the shelter by the gang KOB*K.

The gang was set on his destruction because he was a high ranked member they wanted him back or they wanted him dead. Jay and I broke up shortly later the next day I believe because he feared that they would hurt me if they realized how much he cared. I didn't understand at the time but I did later when a gang member tried to kill me in the department.

Jay was attacked again at the reform center and the pastor who runs the center was killed. We found Jay at his daughter's house the daughter he gave away when he was a kid. The gang tried to hurt her but we were able to hide her.

That night was terrible. Jay was shot point blank to the hand and it left his hand useless except for two fingers and he was stabbed in the back that left him in a wheelchair for months. But we were no longer living in fear or at least that is what I thought.

I found out I was pregnant shortly later. The same day I found out I was pregnant Jay was arrested for criminally negligent homicide. It was just the overzealous DA trying to prove himself.

Four months later we got eloped and learned that I was pregnant with a boy and a girl

The night before he was set to testify he confessed killing five people throughout his journey with the KOB*K it was troubling to hear that my husband was a murderer.

Then two months later I gave birth to two healthy babies, McKenna Lynne Heldon and Chance Holbrooke Heldon.


	2. Us Now

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch2: Us Now

* * *

Jay was put on five years of probation, which was supposed to end last year.

Jay and I were married for three happy years and two years of hell. We separated last year, it wasn't a good separation.

Jay and I got into an argument one night; I believed that he was cheating. I still do believe he cheated, but anyway he claimed he hadn't. We argued I

slapped him a couple times he can calling me Miss Cate and cussing at me, and then he accused me of cheating. I slapped him again, and he pushed me I stumbled back and cracked the wall with my head. I was knocked unconscious and Jay called the police and he was arrested for Domestic Violence. I was not going to have Jay go to prison over a fight that got out of hand. His probation was extended by three years he was lucky he didn't go back to prison. The DA asked if Jay's parental rights should be taken away but I could never do that.

Oh, and then the day we found Nick I was at the hospital with the rest of team we were all so relieved. I went outside to get some fresh air it was a freak coincidence that Nick's nurse was also Jay's sister Lisa. So I wasn't surprised when Jay sat next to me on a bench.

_"How's your friend?"_

_"He's ok"_

_"Good, I'll keep the twins tonight... Just call me alright"_

_"Alright"_

_"Night Miss Cate"_

_"Night Jay" I said he padded me on the shoulder and left._

A day later Jay's brother, Tyler, was killed in a drive by after getting released from prison for the murder of Patrick Keepsy. The same day or night rather, Jay got into a fight he cracked his cane over a guy's head at one of Sam's casinos. He wasn't as lucky with that arrest, he went to prison for 3 months and got out two weeks ago.

Chance and McKenna are starting the first grade, they missed their father when he went to prison and it broke my heart.

Carly is going to UNLV I don't remember her degree but her and Lindsay are alright friends. Lindsay is starting the eighth grade and likes boys. The thought alone scares me and Jay has already offered to hurt any future boyfriends.

Jay and I are friends now but I don't think we can be together again after everything that has happens.

Jay drops the twins off at the lab on Mondays to check in with his probation officer.

"Hey Chance, hey McKenna" I hear Grissom say from the hallway. McKenna runs into my office followed by Chance, Chance looks exactly like Jay with the exception of a cute set of dimples.

Jay leans in the doorway, the only time we see each other is here at the lab.

Jay isn't allowed to come to my house because of the Domestic Violence arrest.

"Hi Mommy!" they say in unison as I hug them both, Warrick stared Jay down.

Warrick hates Jay web before the whole arrest but the arrest set Warrick over the edge. Warrick comes to my office everytime Jay comes to the lab.

"How are you guys?" I say kissing them.

"Look at the shoes daddy gotted me they light up" McKenna said stomping her foot I ran my fingers through her wavy blonde hair two blonde hair blue eyed babies I love my babies.

"Mines is better" Chance said he had a slight lisp.

"I think there both cool" I say, to prevent a fight between the two of them.

"Warrick is going to take you to the break room... I'll be there in a minute ok"

"Ok... I'll beat you Chance"

"No way Jose" they took off again, Warrick followed bumping into Jay. Jay looked at the ceiling releasing a loud sigh, Jay was not welcomed here but had to bring the twins here often.

"I'll be back in a couple hours" he said leaving. Prison changes people Jay has spent half his life in prison I wonder what he would be like if he grow up in a different setting. He is the perfect example of nature or nurture? After his last time in prison however I believe he went back to the gang, after everything he went back.

He still has the purple star tattoo on his neck, you can faintly see the KOB*K written on his jaw line. But then again his one hand still doesn't work except for his thumb and index finger and he limps when he walks. With reminders like that I don't understand how someone like that could go back to that.

Jay picks up the twins a few hours later like he said he would. We rarely talk to each other.

Grissom hands out cases shortly after the twins leave.

"Nick and Sara you have a double out in Henderson suspected homicide-suicide"

Nick jumps up and takes the slip.

"I'm driving" he said he's almost back to his old self but still a little PTSD like.

"Warrick and Catherine 419 in the projects Brass has the location"

We walk outside and there are two uniform officers playing monkey in the middle with Jay's keys. I see Warrick smile as Jay is being teased; everyone at the department knew what Jay had done.

Jay pushes the officer hard and next thin the officer knew his feet were touching the sky. His partner tackles Jay as Warrick and I run to them, Warrick pushes the officer off and slams Jay against the car.

"Damn..." Jay says as Warrick searches him. I help the officer up and it's none other than Sergeant Michael he's new to our department and has a wee bit crush on me. He knows about Jay and knows that I'm seeing Chris.

"Sergeant Michael, you and your partner get out of here before I get Brass!" the officers ran off, I picked up Jay's keys and hand them to him. He took then and shook off of Warrick's grip, they starred each other down I pushed Jay in his car and pulled Warrick away.


	3. Bad Reasons

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch3: Bad Reasons

* * *

I don't believe in coincidences I believe everything happens for a reason. I'm walking inside a home in the same 'hood' where I met Jay. This cannot be good.

I walk in behind Warrick, our victim was in his living room on his couch and ice pick sticking out the side of his neck, his body slumped forward his hand reaching for something.

"Say hello to Adonis Lawson also known as _'A New Don'_ his parole officer called it in... So far canvas has turned up nothing" I snap many photos of the body.

"Give me a hand" David says as him and Warrick push the body back, his shirt was black but he had a red shirt on underneath. "Rigor is set that would put death 12 hours ago between 10 and midnight"

"Wrong colors" I say snapping a photo.

"What was he pointing to?" Warrick says walking to the end-table he opens up the draw. "Oh lookie here" Warrick held up an Uzi. "How the hell you miss this?" Warrick says to the PO I snap a few photos.

"Listen here bud I search his place randomly once a month I haven't searched it yet this month" the old man said chomping on a toothpick.

"Bag it we will process it later"

"I got a blood trail here" I say, the blood trail is strange the right footprint was smeared like the perp had a limp.

"11... And a half inches give or take that would make a size thirteen"

After a few hours of evidence collecting. I went outside I look around the mood of the 'hood' is certainly different from times I came with Jay. It's like a ghetto ghost town. I look forward and see a white cross by the sidewalk across the street. I put my camera in my kit and walk across the street; I smell the flowers that surrounded the cross. It had writing on it 'For our boy Ty Heldon'

I feel a little hand touch my shoulder. I look it and it was a boy maybe 11 or 12 he looked the part of little thug but no way was a thug. He was dirty and looked hungry, it's a shame. Boys like this one are called Scrappers, and they are all over the hood.

The women here are treated like gods if they do what the guys ask. This is usually prostitution, or when someone has to talk to the police because they had to be clean except the older ones. Jay said the women are Amys short for Amethyst the purple gem.

* * *

I process the ice pick I place it in the chamber and evaporate some super glue. I photograph the partial print and as it loads in the computer I leave to see Warrick.

I threw away my gloves and Warrick nearly tackles me over as he bumps into me in the hallway.

"Easy Warrick" he was nearly out of breath he grabs my forearm and pulls me into my dink of an office.

"You have to see these results" I shook off his grip.

"What?"

"The gun has a body on it"

"Who?" I read the file.

"Tyler Heldon" I felt my stomach drop and literally hit the floor. "I figured I should give you a heads up..."

"I hope you know Catherine you are off the case" Grissom said from the doorway.

"Why?"

"Do I need to remind you that you the victim is now the lead suspect in you ex-husband's brother murder...? Don't fight me on this Catherine" Grissom said taking a phone call leaving. Grissom is on drugs if he thinks I'm just going to back off.

After shift I stopped at Jay's house I was actually parked on the street across from his house. I see Jay's door open and a woman leave Jay follows her holding her hand.

I interrupt their make out session as I walk to his driveway. I clear my throat and they stop.

"Hi Miss Cate, this is Monique... Monique this is Catherine Chance and McKenna's mother" Jay says fiddling with his hat which was white. Monique was a tall African American woman with a Halle Berry haircut.

"Hello"

"Hi" I say Monique fakes a smile.

"I'll give you a phone call" Monique said reluctantly letting go of Jay's hand. She drives away, and Jay starts walking away.

"I have to talk to you" I reply grabbing his arm.

"Are you trying to get me thrown back in prison?" he says I feel his hot breath on my face. I look away as does he.

Jay isn't allowed to my house but I am allowed to his, after many people tried to explain this to him he still doesn't understand.

I look at his back as he turns around lighting a cigarette, the tattoo removal crème barely worked but then again he did get more. I saw a new KOB*K tattoo on the back of his neck just barely though his haircut was similar to a Mohawk but not quite.

"Bad habit" I say he turns around and blows the smoke in the air and puts the cigarette out on the ground.

"What do you want?"

"Are you backing with the gang?"

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why? They tried to kill you"

"It's late..." Jay says turning around walking back to his house he's back with the gang.

"You son of a bitch you are!"

"Why did you come over?"

"We found a suspect in your brother's murder"

"Who?"

"Where were you last night?"

"I brought the twins to go see a movie we went out to eat and Carly met up with us there we left got back here round 8:30 maybe 9, the twins went straight to bed as did I... Why?"

"Do you know Adonis Lawson?"

"No..."

"What size foot are you?"

"Why all the questions?" Jay says defiantly.

"The police are going to want to speak with you" I say turning around.

"Catherine what is going on? You're coming over here in the middle of the night playing 20Q, why?" he turns me around but quickly puts his hands up in a surrendering gesture.

"I had to get answers"

"To my foot size? What's really going on? Am I in trouble?"

"I don't know... Kiss the twins for me" I said leaving.

* * *

Reviews Please!


	4. Round Two

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch4: Round Two

* * *

I yawn walking into the lab, I sip my coffee and then I see Jay walking in with Warrick and Brass. Jay's biggest problem was that he looks like a criminal. The Mohawk, the tattoos, his clothes, and his rap sheet are as long as my arm and he's uneducated. I nearly choke on my coffee as he looks back at me as soon as they turn the corner I head straight for observation room to watch the interrogation.

"Why don't you sit down Mr. Heldon" Brass said very monotone like as Warrick starred him down. "Are you sure you don't want your lawyer?"

"No I didn't do anything wrong"

"How are the shelters coming? I heard the night club business is being good to you" Brass said, Jay and his friend Target co-own many clubs all over the strip.

"Good, there have also been some community centers too... If you give the children something to do outside of school they will stay in school"

"Aren't you just a big ol' philanthropist?" Brass said earning a confused look from Jay. "Someone who gives back to their community"

"Oh... For real though what's up? I been doing good just ask my PO"

"We did and he said you have been doing good... Do you know Adonis Lawson?"

"No, should I?"

"When was the last time you were back in your 'hood'?" Brass mocks Jay just smiles.

"Well Captain Brass I was just released from prison two weeks ago as soon as I got out I saw my brother who was with my other brother when he was shot I just wanted information on what happened"

"Why not talk to a cop?"

"I was in prison and I remember Catherine talking about the case that fall thru the cracks and that's what happened to my brother... I just wanted answers I know it's against my probation but I had to do something"

"Adonis Lawson is the lead suspect in his murder and we found him murdered yesterday" Brass says as Warrick slides a crime scene photo over.

"Ice pick to the neck and a partial match to you" Warrick says continuing to stare at him.

"No... No I didn't do that! I don't even know that guy! I just got out of prison I'm in no hurry to get back" he said pushing the photo back.

"Where were you the night before last?"

"I took the twins to a movie then dinner we got back home around 8:30ish and I was in for the night"

"Using your kids as an alibi"

"I don't need an alibi I didn't do anything wrong" Jay said flabbergasted.

"You're a big guy, you wear what a size thirteen give or take" Jay nods "we have a partial match of your finger print on the murder weapon, foot prints suggesting the person has a limp like yourself, and you have no alibi"

"I didn't do anything! No I'm done talking you get me my lawyer or you let me go"

I can't believe this they have a match to the murder weapon and to think I thought he was innocent. Brass and Warrick stand Jay shakes his head in disbelief and slaps him several times.

"You are free to go don't leave the city" Brass said, Jay stands.

"I have a family now and I realize what I have, I'm not going to waste that over some chump... Even if he murdered my brother Tyler wouldn't want me to do that" Jay says smoothing his hair "I'm not some..."

"Shut up!" Warrick yells only inches from Jay's face "I don't need to know your triumph story. You're lucky I don't bash your face into the ground. You're lucky Catherine didn't have your sorry ass thrown in prison. Shut the fuck up and get out of the department now!" Warrick yells Jay stands defiantly, Brass stands between the two and Jay leaves with his PO.

This day keeps getting worst because that night I take off early hopefully to surprise Chris and I get surprised by him and his play thing. Not to mention she's half my age that's great for my self esteem.

I sit on the couch still wearing my dress, my mom is in the guess room Lindsay is asleep. The twins are with me until this mess blows over. I open up a beer and kick off my heels I guess it's on to the next one. As I get older the next one gets further and further away someone my age can't depend on the next one to be the knight in shining armor at my doorstep.

I watch the reporter give the news. I don't care for sports and Nicky always gives us scoop on sports. Weather is no surprise triple degree heat for the rest of the weak.

I was on the verge of sleep when I heard someone banging on my door I put my beer on the end table. Wait it's probably Chris, I sit back on my couch.

"Go away Chris!"

"It's me Miss Cate, please let me in" holy shit it's Jay. I run to the door as Jay pounds louder and louder.

"Jay what are you doing here?" I say a he pushes past me sitting on the couch that he bought me for our anniversary.

"I have to show you something..." he says nervously looking through a large folder. "Nice dress"

"Jay what are you doing?" I say in a harsh whisper. He starts placing papers out of the folder on the glass table. "Jay you are not supposed to be here! What are you doing here?" he doesn't even acknowledge me speaking to him.

"I have to show you something"

"Jay!" I pull on his arm making him face me, he looks dishabille.

"Someone is framing me..." he yells I hear a ding noise and glass breaking. Jay falls into the glass table breaking that too.

"Don't you touch her you son of a bitch!" my mom yells aiming the broken beer bottle at Jay.

"Mom!" I yell I pull the bottle away from her. I hear Jay groan as he tries to roll over his head and shoulder bleeding pretty bad.

"don't get mad at me last time he was here he put your head through the wall!" my mom yells kicking Jay, as he passes out "I just beat him to it this time" she says, he struggles to stand he staggers to the door slamming into it before leaving.

"Jay!" I shout as he regains his composure running to his car and peeling out. I stand at the porch yelling for him, I turn around and see Chance rubbing his eyes. He cries.

Chance is timid and shy but has a temper like Jay. McKenna is loud, out-going, and sensitive. They are total opposites but are very protective of one another.

Lindsay comes out scoops Chance up, bringing him to his room. Lindsay is a wonderful older sister. When Jay and I got into our fight, she took out the twins out of the house to a fellow neighbors' who called the police on that terrible night.

After I gave my living room a thorough douche job. I look at what Jay brought they were receipts and photos of his brother Tyler and Adonis Lawson together.

I checked on Chance, he was asleep not very peacefully but asleep.

"Mom what is going on?" Lindsay asks coming from behind me. She's become very mature these last couple years I would never tell her though.

"Nothing honey, go back to bed" I turn and say to her.

"I don't believe you mom I saw Jay here, what's going on?"

"I'm not sure but once I know I'll tell you"

* * *

Please Review! Pretty Please!


	5. Confusion

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch5: Confusion

* * *

Somehow Grissom found out about me telling Jay about the case before he was questioned so I'm on thin ice. And I talked to Mandy and she said the match was only a two-point out of a five point possible so it could be anybody's print and now I'm hiding outside the DNA lab eavesdropping on the results. Apparently Doc Robbins found blood under the victim's nails.

"what do you have for us Wendy?" Grissom says, he must of finished his case with Greg.

"I couldn't pull DNA from the blood sorry... However you are looking for a male by the testosterone levels but besides that he's healthy" Wendy says sounding disappointed.

"it's alright" Grissom says walking right in front of me and stopping. Shit I'm in trouble. "Catherine, are you trying to get yourself fired!"

"No, I need to know what's going on?"

"it's ongoing you know we can't talk about it. It would jeopardize the case whether Jay is guilty or innocent. Go home before Ecklie catches you snooping around"

"I work here"

"not today" he leaves as do I.

I walk away defeated, I unlock my car and sigh loudly.

"Catherine!" I hear I turn around an it was Chris. His eye is swollen shut and his lip was split and his jaw was bruised.

"what happened?"

"I cheat on you and you send people to beat me up! I'm sorry! I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you ok! Please tell him to stay away!"

"I'm sorry" I leave in disbelief.

* * *

I walk inside one of the clubs I remember that Jay would often work at, out of all of them. I see the younger adults dancing and drinking having a good time. I look around brushing the bangs out of my face, Target approaches me.

"hello Catherine" he says over the loud music. Throw a thug in a suit an he almost looks like a upstanding member of society.

"I need to talk to Jay where is he?"

"Look up" Target says leaving. I look up and see Jay on the upper level bobbing his head to the music. He has a bandage on the side of his forehead, I walk up to the upper level with no resistance by the bouncer.

I rest on the railing next to him he looks up at me.

"I went to talk to you earlier but you left I followed you to a club but I went in to talk to you you walked right by me crying. So I went to see what you saw..." he says looking at me "I told him I had an offer to make him if he met me in the alley"

"Jay you are on probation an the prime suspect in a murder investigation... You can't fight people" I say he looks away clinching his jaw "especially for me"

"if anyone causes you discomfort I can't stand for it"

"as a friend I'm asking you don't"

"friend?"

"we are friends"

"friends don't have orders of protection against eachother for good reasons... Friends don't put friends heads through walls..."

"friends don't have there mother hit there friends with a beer bottle" I say he smiles timidly.

"touché... But she was right I shouldn't have been there" he says checking his watch. "walk with me"

I follow him into his office he pulls out a pouch that looks similar to a first aid kit. He throws his jacket on his desk and rolls his sleeves, he looks very nice very professional.

"why did you come to my house?" I ask as he takes some pills I give him a wary look.

"it's for my heart" he said drinking his water. "nitroglycerin and some other stuff"

"why did you come to my house?" I ask he immediately looks down at his pouch and pulls out a diabetic blood tester.

"I hired a private investigator when I was in prison. He told me that he had a couple suspects he went on vacation and got back a few days ago. One of the suspects was Adonis Lawson"

"you lied..."

"yes if I had said yes I would have sealed my fate and a oneway ticket back to prison"

"did you kill him?" I ask sitting next to him he places the kit next to him. He looks at me and I feel frightened in a strangely nice way.

"no"

"pinky promise me?" I say putting my pinky in his face he takes it with his good hand. "promise you wouldn't do anything to get yourself thrown back in prison... Away from Chance and McKenna, Carly, and hell even Lindsay"

"I promise" he says his voice a little hoarse. "I don't want to be away from you guys. I love my family I'm not going anywhere" he says smiling I smile, my stomach feels sick like nervous sick. I don't pull my hand away either does he, I look at his hand and I let my eyes wander. I see the word 'Cate' on his wrist I immediately think of better times of him and me.

His lips brush against mine as he gives me a sweet kiss, I kiss have back with more desire. We continue to kiss until we hear a knock on the door it scares us both. It brings us back to reality. What the hell was I doing? I immediately jump off his couch pulling my hand away from his.

Target walks in, sensing the new and well-earned discomfort in the room.

"umm... Jay the police are here"

"oh shit where?" Jay says standing he looks scared.

"downstairs a short kind of chubby guy and a man with gray hair an kind of beard asked me to see if you were here... What do you want to do?"

"I got to get out of here! If Grissom sees me I'm fired!" I say Jay looks at me then at Target.

"bring her to your office and I'll tell Reggie to send up the police" Jay says Target walks to the closet opening the door I follow hesitantly.

"see those stairs" he says pointing down I look.

"yea go down them and take a right" I run down the stairs which was hard with my shoes and the door weighed about a thousand pounds but I opened I was outside. What kind of office is this? I look around and find my way back to the street I look to the right and see Brass bringing Jay out in handcuffs. My mind start circling.

A couple hours later I drive to the department I look in all the interrogation rooms. Finally a one way that shows me what I want, I see Brass interrogating Jay. Jay looks scared like scared when he confessed murdering five people. Not scared himself but scared for I would do. I reach to turn up the sound, but Grissom's hand beats me to it he turns it down.

"Catherine"

"I'm sorry Griss, but he didn't do it..."

"I believe you but..."

"but what?"

"he confessed" he says handing me the confession.


	6. What the Heart Needs

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch6: What the Heart Needs

* * *

He confessed! He confessed! What the hell he lied right to my face. I don't know what came over me but I take the confession and storm the interrogation. I throw the confession at Jay it hits him in the face, he couldn't swat it away his hands were cuffed to the table.

"Catherine..." Brass says sternly.

"I need to talk to him" I say I feel tears fill my eyes, hurt and betrayed was only part of my feelings. Brass looks at Grissom I assume Grissom agreed because Brass left. "read it!" I yell in anger I feel a tear flow down my cheek.

"I... I know what it says"

"you promised me that you wouldn't do anything to get yourself thrown back in prison. And get taken away from Chance and McKenna, Carly, and Lindsay"

"I lied..."

"how could you do this, Jay? You're self-fish! If you cared about your children than you would never want to be away! You only care about yourself and our poor kids have to pay because they have a self-fish father" I cry he reaches and grabs my hands his eyes red and glassy.

"do you..." he clears his thought fighting his own tears "do you remember when we went out to eat for our anniversary and we came home and the twins had colored there arms? Carly and Lindsay were trying to wash them before we got home, Chance said he wanted arms like me" Jay says his voice cracking "I'm sorry" he cries. I realize just then he's innocent.

"me too"

_It was our third anniversary Jay took me out to the restaurant where he proposed. We went ate a wonderful meal and when we came home and Carly and _

_Lindsay were in the bathroom washing Jay's dress white shirt._

_'what are you doing?' Jay asked turning the water off, he took his shirt from there backs._

_'umm... I spilt grape soda on it' Carly said standing in front of Lindsay._

_'grape soda?' Jay said looking at the purple stain. Chance and McKenna came running in with purple scribbles on there arms._

_'look we got arms like you daddy' McKenna said, I felt her arms they were wet and the ink was spreading. Jay picked up Chance looking at his arms._

_'it's my fault I fell asleep and when I woke up they were coloring each other' Carly said as if preparing for a scolding._

_'don't worry it's fine'_ he thinks Carly is the killer, why?

"you're not helping anyone by doing this" I say still angry he turns and looks at me as I grab the handle.

"I'm done talking to you"

"you're throwing your life away!"

"what life? I'm not like you, okay? I never will be. I'm sorry that our priorities are different. I can't change me" he stands and stares me down.

"don't look at me like that! Don't try to make it look like you're a martyr!" I yell he looks down "a martyr is someone who is put to death or endures great suffering on behalf of any belief, principle, or cause..."

"you think I doing this for me! Then I guess you don't know me as well as you think!"

"I know you're not a killer"

"I confessed five murders to you! I am a killer!"

"you may have been then but you are not one now! He was stabbed on the left side your left hand barely works..."

"stop!" he yells "it is better if it goes down like this"

"what about Chance and McKenna? What do I tell them?"

"they'll forget about me" he says sitting down.

"I can't let this happen"

"why? After everything I've done it's better this way"

"no... No it's not" I say softly.

"says who, you! I said it before and I'll say it again. We are the same we don't think the same we don't act the same... This is what is right!"

"Jay listen to yourself!"

"you think that I'm proud that our kids are going to grow up with me an ex con as their father! I may not be the best father but I love my kids!"

"then why would you do this?"

"...I... Love my... Kids" he starts breathing harder. "this is... My fault"

"Jay are you alright?" I stop and look he starts to breakout in a sweat.

"my chest..." he says passing out, Brass and Grissom come rushing in. I run to Jay and check for a pulse it was weak and erratic.

"Jay!" I cry grabbing his head Brass uncuffs him laying him down listening to his chest.

"he's having a heart attack" Brass says "Grissom get the AED!" Grissom took off tears start to fill my eyes and realize he has no pulse. Brass takes out his knife cutting Jay's shirt open and starts doing chest compressions. "how long has Jay had a heart condition?" I look confused at him as he motions to a medical alert bracelet. It reads 'this person has a HEART CONDITION andDIABETES'

"I don't know... I don't know... I don't know" I mumble

Grissom comes in and applies the AED and sends a call out to paramedic.

"stand clear" the machine says I hear a zap and Jay's chest.

"I got a pulse!" he said I grab Jay's hand.

"Jay can you hear me?" I say squeezing his hand.

* * *

I wait anxiously at the hospital with Grissom. The doctor had said that Jay had a foreign blockage in his heart Jay gave me power of attorney when we got married. In our divorce proceedings he didn't change his mind.

Jay's doctor came out I run over to him.

"how is he?" I say with my stomach churning.

"he's in recovery right now. He had a heart attack the foreign blockage seems to be a fragment of a bullet, ma'am"

"is he alright?"

"his heart took a big hit. And there has been permanent damage, only time will tell"

"can I see him?"

"I'll have a nurse get you when he wakes up which should be soon"

* * *

Reviews?


	7. Heart

No Gangsta Love

Disclaimer: I don't own them just Jay and the KOB*K is mine.

Please Review and Enjoy!

Ch7: Heart

* * *

I walk into Jay's room I'm greeted by a uniformed officer. I see Jay he looks borderline lifeless his body just exhausted. The officer allows me to walk inside. Jay's tattoos on his arms in full exposure with IVs in his arms.

"Miss... Cate..." he says, his voice hoarse, he struggles to lift his hand.

"Oh Jay..." I say standing next to him.

"Miss..."

"Sh... Jay you had a heart attack you have to rest"

"I'm sorry" he says

"Why did you confess?" I ask he moves his wrist showing he's handcuffed to the bed. I ask knowing he's heavy medicated hoping he would slip up and tell me something.

"Because I did know him. He was Carly's boyfriend and I was scared that she was going to do something" he takes a deep breath his eyes barely open "Carly said he cheated and then one night she said she was with the Harvey's but I called that night and they said she was suppose to be with me... I may have hinted to old friends" he says pulling his hand away from mine "I'm not a dumb as I look"

"Jay..."

"Some people owe me some favors"

"Did you put a hit out on him?"

"No never miss Cate... But a red in my old hood. Let's just say I'm surprise he lasted as long as he did. I'm surprised that his PO didn't know where he was act. But my hands aren't dirty from this one"

"We will find out who killed him"

"Good... Cause my hands are clean" he said rubbing his hands together as if washing them.

"What about Carly?"

"She didn't do this"

"We cleared you but even you just said you didn't know where she was"

"She didn't do this... You said you found a blood sample of a healthy male she's not a male and I ain't healthy we both cleared... I thought for a brief second she was dirty but she's not"

"Rest Jay"

"How about these cuffs?" he asks his eyes close. I was about to answer him when I heard yelling almost chatting from outside the hospital.

"KOB*K for life!" a young man yelled with a Mohawk tattoos covering his neck and arms. "Ay... Ay Amy? How's fireman?" the boy said to me.

"Amy?"

"Yea... Shawty, I know you a gem if you be in fireman's room with the pigs at the door" the kid said the officer looked at the kid. "Guard that shit homeboy. Important man in that room"

"You know Jay Heldon?"

"Yea, shawty" he said flashing a smile.

"You come with me" I took the kid and we walked away. "How do you know Jay Heldon?"

"He's a founding father... Top OG"

"Who are you?"

"You can call me Young Scrap, Amy"

"The name is Catherine"

"Whoa the famous Miss Cate... It's an honor"

"Famous?"

"You is a cop and you got the Fireman to change his whole hustle for you. You should gets a prize"

"You with the gang now?"

"I was jumped in at 13 been rolling ever since"

"How do you know Jay?"

"He's a legend everybody on the block knows him"

"But he's not rolling with the gang anymore"

"Once a KOBK boy always a KOBK boy... I don't know what he tells you during pillow talk but they ain't no turning back I saw fireman just the other day that's why I'm down here shawty... He's the head dawg"

"The KOBK turned their back on him... One even tried to kill him"

"Yo that's old shit... Denise was a crazy bitch and she got got. The KOBK needed new leadership Ty filled in for a bit been then he got got... Fireman has been rolling with us ever since his pinch in county" he says I cover my face "but we is a good organization we help the community so don't try and be getting Fireman locked up he's a good man" I walked away and went to the elevator just as Target was trying to the leave. I block him and tell everyone to get out.

"How long has Jay been running with KOBK, again?"

"I don't know what you are talking about?" he says. I know he is lying Target is Jay's best friend Chance's godfather a position Jay thought was very serious.

"I don't want to be the one to tell you" he says I leave the elevator and head back for Jay's room.

"Hey fireman..." I say mocking him he just laughs "how long have you been running with the KOBK?"

"Officially for a couple months... Unofficially for a couple years now ever since our marriage started to go down the drain"

"Officially and unofficially? That's not going to matter when you get arrested... Again because we both know it will happen again!"

"This is the only life I know! I've made a good life like this"

"You've spent have your life in prison"

"I've gotten locked up even when I wasn't rolling with them"

"What are the kids going to think?" I say flabbergasted.

"I'm done with this"

"Done with what?" I say my anger raging through my body.

"With this! I'm in no mood to argue so just leave me alone!" I leave. I never want to see him again he's so dumb so ignorant because of all the drama he went through and what I went through and he went back. I can't believe this.

* * *

A week later... The case has been cold Carly went on a surprise vacation to Dominican Republic. Jay went home he signed himself out of the hospital and has been home resting.

Today though I have to go to school for a parent teacher conference. Chance has been having trouble with reading so his teacher, Mr. Trawl, set up an appointment. However when I arrive at their school and it is a ghost town. Mr. Trawl wasn't one to blow off appointments he seemed very straight lace. I thought he was a decent teacher. Jay hated him; Jay went to the majority of the meetings. I remember the first time he went to school they called me to make sure he was who he was.

His classroom was empty so I decided to look around I love the cubbies they have however the sour milk smell I could get rid of. I look and find Chance's cub. His name tag he wrote himself putting stars all over it like the ones on Jay's arms and neck... Gosh I dislike him right now and his damn tattoos.

I continue to walk around until the principal walks in looking as if someone was shot in front of him.

"Can I help you, ma'am?" he says

"Yes I'm Chance Heldon's mom I have a parent teacher meeting with Mr. Trawl"

"All of his appointments have been cancelled"

"Well can I reschedule?"

"No" he says leaving I was going to chase him down because I knew something was up but my phone was ringing... It was Jay.

"What is it Jay?" I ask already angry. We haven't spoken since I found out he shipped Carly and the Harvey's to the Dominican Republic.

"How soon can you get to my house?" he says

"Why?"

"It's really important... I don't... I... Just come over" he says distraught

"Please"

"I'll be over"

I arrive at Jay's massive home it is practically a mansion the twins and Lindsay loves it here. He has a pool and indoor basketball court so much stuff for them to do. Jay offered to buy me one but I refused I never wanted him to have something over me.

I see Jay on the deck sitting in his wheelchair he looks pissed. I walk up and look at him.

"What's going on Jay?" I say he looks up and I can tell he's been crying.

"Chance came home school and said he saw Mr. Trawl getting arrested I ask him why and he said that the policeman said it was because Mr. Trawl was a dirty rotten pedophile" he said I could see the rage pumping through his veins.

"Did he touch Chance?" I say water filling my eyes.

"Chance wouldn't tell me... He asked me... he asked me if it was okay if... If it was okay if people could touch his wee wee" Jay said

"Where is he?"

"In his room" I walked to his room and he's playing with his action figures Jay wheels in behind me as Target pushes him.

"Hey baby"

"Hi mommy. You want to play with me?"

"Later..."

"Are you going to move in with us?"

"No honey..."

"Oh"

"Daddy said Mr. Trawl got arrested"

"Yea... He was a dirty rotten pedophile" he says mocking the policeman. "Mommy is people allowed to touch your wee wee?"

"Why do you ask that?"

"Cause I saw Mr. Trawl touch Jimmy's wee wee"

"No it's not honey... Did he touch you?"

"No" a sigh of relief come from Jay and I. Oh thank god.

"It's not okay for anyone to touch you there"

"Then how come Jimmy won't talk to me!" Chance cried turning away so no one would see him crying.

"Jimmy just going through some stuff... But no one touched you?"

"No! Everyone keeps asking me that! No he didn't touch"

"Who already asked you?"

"Mr. McDaniel my principal he wouldn't leave me alone about it... Can I just play now?"

"Yes honey"


End file.
